The World Cup

All the important questions answered by our resident 'experts'

The World Cup starts in four days and if you’re anything like us, you’ll be starting to feel quite excited. Memories of Schillaci’s goals, Lechkov knocking out the Germans and Zidane headbutting Materazzi have all come flooding back.

Naturally, as a self respecting football blog, we’ll be posting various items around the event. And we thought there was no better way to start than by providing a few early predictions, if only to look back on with embarrassment when the tournament ends... We’ve enlisted the help of regular CollinsBeans contributors Tim Rickard, Luke Kelly and James Cowley (in addition to ourselves) to come up with a few thoughts.

Please note: these predictions were made before the recent injuiry news so excuse any mentions of Ferdinand, Robben, Drogba and any other major player who drops out between now and Friday.

Right, we’ll start with the big one… which WAG will first be spotted in South Africa by the British media?

TR: Chantelle Tagoe

LK: Alex Curran. Purely because this is an opportunity to say I saw her in Southport once sneaking in the backdoor of Gerrard's hotel without resorting to crude innuendo. Though I did hear the pancakes are pretty good there.

JC: Got to be Clancy. Sounds like a Harry Enfield character but she is a bit tidy!

MS: Well thanks to a certain England left back (the one who doesn’t share the same last name as a volatile Championship manager from Yorkshire), we won’t have the chance to the ‘lovely’ (TM) Mrs (or should that be Miss?) Cheryl Cole (or should that be Tweedy?). So, I’m going international, and nominating Sylvie van der Vaart, wife of, well it’s not Shane Smeltz is it? She’s a one women entertainment machine on the continent, and given she is both a judge on ‘Germany’s Got Talent’ AND the German version of Strictly Come Dancing, if she were English, she’d be the most famous person in the country.

JP: Not an easy one to call with Mrs. Beckham and Mrs. Cole/Tweedy not technically required to attend (for separate reasons of course). Therefore I’m going for the slightly predictable choice of Christine Bleakley. Possibly the only WAG who legitimately might be “working”.

Back to the football, who is going to win the thing?

TR: My heart says it won't be England, and my head says it certainly won't be England. But if we can get to the semis then we're in with a shot. In the meantime, I'll plump for Brazil.

LK: Brazil, possibly without scoring more than 2 goals in any game. People bang on about the discipline Capello's brought to England, but Dunga's done this far more impressively for Brazil. It's a bit of a cliché, but Brazil are now the best example of a team that's just set up to win football matches.

JC: Brazil or possibly Holland (see below)

MS: Call me mad, call me crazy, but something, just something, is pulling me, almost hypnotically towards Argentina. I know they were an absolute shambles in qualification (but then so were Brazil in 2002 and look what happened there), I know they’ve picked a squad with no full backs and I know they are going to an international tournament in 2010 with Martin ‘3 penalties’ Palermo in their squad and they have Maradona, but if playing for him can’t inspire the Argentine players, no-one can. Finally they have Messi, the best player in the world. You can call the men in white coats now...

JP: Hmm, never easy this. I do like the look of Brazil, so my head says Dunga’s men. My heart says Argentina though, galvanised by an insane Maradonna and his radical, maverick tactics. The more I (logically) think about it though, the less convinced I am that having a complete madman in charge of your team can actually allow you to win the World Cup… I’ll stick with Brazil.

What about the sacred golden boot?

TR: Well it won't be Emile. So now I've ruled him out, I'll go for David Villa.

LK: I'm going with Fabiano. I'd be a tempted for a cheeky punt on Higuain were I not convinced that Argentina will lose every game after Maradona puts him in goal.

JC: Van Persie or Drogba

MS: It stands to reason the golden boot should go to a player whose team goes far in the tournament, so sadly that rules out Plymouth Argyle’s Rory Fallon. It’s a toss-up between Luis Fabiano and David Villa for me, and I’m just going to plump for the Spaniard for his extra class and the fact he’ll be buoyed by his big move to Barcelona coming up after the tournament.

JP: I’m going with the obvious names here – Luis Fabiano, David Villa, Lionel Messi or Wayne Rooney. I think good outside bets are a couple of the Dutch boys – Robben and Van Persie, plus Italy’s Di Natale. As you can see, I’m cynically covering all bases here. I’ll stick my neck out though and say Van Persie as my number one choice.

This horrible phrase is thrown about before every tournament, but who do you see as the “dark horses”?

TR: Argentina might prove that they are finally capable of gelling under Maradona. But I don't think there will be any other surprising success stories. Maybe the odd Paraguay getting to the second round, but certainly no chance of the Ivory Coast getting to the final four or something, like some pundits have predicted.

LK: In a slightly bizarre way, Argentina. I think a lot of people (myself included) think they'll crash and burn, and yet at the same time there's always the chance that a dose of Maradona madness will see them blundering through the tournament like a pig on crack.

JC: Pardon the pun but Ivory Coast (or Holland). Has everyone forgotten the rest of Europe after Spain and England? Also can't rule out the pesky Germans. There's no pressure on them now that Ballack is out. They'll probably get to the semis at a canter.

MS: Spain. Oh sorry, I forgot that was the answer for every World Cup between, um, 1930 and 2006? Now they’re firmly in the ‘favourites camp’ the stock answer seems to be the Ivory Coast, mainly because they have Drogba and everyone’s heard of their players. However if you want an African team to look out for, with or without Michael Essien, I like the look of Ghana, especially if their squad is bolstered by some of the players who won them the U-17 World Cup earlier in the year. Also look out for Chile, who are ridiculously attack minded and play a unique 3-3-1-3 formation. Crazy, I know.

JP: NOT the Ivory Coast. I can see that ending in tears. Also, this will probably result in me looking like a complete fool, yet even though they are awful, I fancy South Africa to cause a couple of surprises (i.e. not lose every game). More conventionally, I think the Netherlands will do really well.

Usually one of the big teams flops – who will choke this time around?

TR: Portugal have a tricky group. I wouldn't be surprised or disappointed if they didn't qualify for the knock-out stages of the competition.

LK: France for me. They'll lose their first two, then fall beneath the wheels of the rainbow juggernaut as it pounds into the final.

JC: France / Portugal. Also England will inevitably fuck up and not achieve the end goal.

MS: France. When you have to cheat so blatantly to beat the likes of Paul McShane and Kevin Kilbane you know you’ve got issues. They’ve got a talented squad, but the fact remains they’re managed by a lunatic (and not in the good Maradona way) who is reviled by erm...basically everyone. I’m laying it out there – I think they’re going home at the group stages.

JP: France have a terrible manager and look really suspect, but their group is so easy that I can’t see them going out until the knockout rounds, which means they won’t technically have flopped. I’d be worried as a Portugal fan…

Which players should we look out for?

TR: Obviously you can't look past a lot of the Spanish contingent. Particularly the likes of Xavi, Villa and Torres (if fit). A lot of Brazilian hope will lie on the shoulders of Kaka. It will be interesting to see how Drogba gets on after such a terrific domestic season. Then finally, of course, the boy from Croxteth.

LK: Aside from the usual suspects, Pienaar on home soil (and possibly playing for a move) could be worth watching.

JC: Hamsik (briefly), Ozil and Robinho.

MS: In a good or a bad way? If you want a name to impress your mates in the pub with (or indeed look really stupid in front of if my track record with predictions is anything to go by) then I’d say, talented Chilean winger Alexis Sanchez. He’s a throwback to a bygone era of tricky wide men. Basically he’s what a winger used to be before the position became bastardised into that of an advanced fullback, see, Kuyt, Dirk.

JP: I’ll again go with the predictable names here – Angel Di Maria, Mesut Ozil, Arjen Robben, Wesley Sneijder and if Argentina get it together, then Messi could explode. And for a bit of patriotism, if England do well I can see Aaron Lennon having a real impact.

St. George flag waving hyperbole aside, how do you rate England’s chances?

TR: As alluded to earlier, I don't think we'll win it. Unless we can prove that we are a settled side, capable of all pulling in the same direction. That relies on the performance of the key partnerships of Terry/Ferdinand, Lampard/Gerrard and finally and most significantly for English hopes: Rooney. I'll go getting to the semi-finals and losing to a team like Brazil.

LK: Brazil leave Ronaldinho at home, England endlessly reshuffle in an attempt to accommodate Steven Gerrard - there's your problem. I think they'll be in and amongst things, but anymore so than previous years? Doubtful.

JC: If they don't get to the semis we should hire a vet and put them all down with shot guns. Easier side of the draw, should get there with the players they've got. Obviously needs a bit of luck to this point, and plenty thereafter.

MS: Before the squad was announced, none too shabby, after it? Not so much. In certain positions we have top class international footballers and (even giving for his slightly bizarre behaviour of late) a top class manager. We’ll cruise through the group and if we can unite the 100%, ‘full on style’ that English teams in the Champions League have had over recent seasons, I think we can break the quarter final glass ceiling. However, that’s where I think the journey ends, when a patently superior Brazil team will ruthlessly exploit the fact that we can’t ever keep the ball for longer than 3 passes. Still, that would be a successful tournament no?

JP: I reckon we’ll go in the quarters, which is pretty much par. I think we can steamroller all the weaker teams, but once we come up against real quality our inability to maintain possession, and our over reliance on Rooney to do everything will see us come unstuck. In the dream world, our side suddenly gels together in a formation which brings out the best of Gerrard and Lampard, and we ride a wave a national pride to force ourselves into the final where John Terry slots home the winning penalty and becomes a national hero. Realistic?

And a statistical one to finish – how many goals will be scored overall? To give you some help, there were 147 in 2006…

TR: Lots of goals hopefully. Apparently the ball is lighter than normal (again). I'll go for 171.

LK: 130. Half of them against Argentina.

JC: 173. Pesky Adidas ball!

MS: 2006 was the World Cup of the defender, and given I’ve just watched a Premier League season filled with some of the most abysmal defending I’ve ever seen, I reckon we’ll get a pretty high scoring one. Let’s be optimistic and go for a whopping...163

JP: It’s a complete stab in the dark, but I’ll say 154 – similar to last time.