Players from France, Italy and England compete to make the final XI...
It was somewhat difficult to refrain from picking the entire England side for this one, and I’m afraid to say certain individuals just couldn’t be ousted from the line up. There is some variation though…
In goal, Robert Green was an obvious candidate although the West Ham man did only participate in one fixture so that seemed slightly unfair. So I’ve gone for Julio Cesar. I’ll caveat this choice by saying I think Cesar is a top quality goalkeeper and one of the top three in the world. However, when it came to this tournament, he essentially crumbled at the most important time. Having had little or nothing to do in the early games, Cesar fluffed his lines when they mattered, having a horrible match against the Netherlands that saw Brazil go tumbling out of the tournament. When it mattered, Cesar didn’t deliver.
At the back, there are again England candidates – the entire back four (barring Ashley Cole) could have made the side, but there was some genuine competition here as well. Martin Demichelis was wretched throughout Argentina’s campaign, even when they were winning. I maintain my previous statement that the man is not a centre back. Fabio Cannavaro sadly showed his age and was constantly vulnerable during Italy’s dismal campaign. So imperious in their victory four years ago, Cannavaro seemed to sum Italy up this time around. Right back was a toss up between two Argentineans, who were both awful. Jonas Guiterrez looked terribly exposed even against the most limited opposition (hello Greece) but in his defence, he’s not a full back. So his replacement Nicolas Otamendi gets the nod. Decent initially, Otamendi was pretty much at fault for all of Germany’s four goals in Argentina’s disastrous quarter final game. The left back slot was also a race between two countrymen. Patrice Evra epitomised everything a captain shouldn’t be during the French debacle, but he’s beaten by colleague William Gallas. Not technically a left back I know, but Gallas had to make this side for three appalling games where it looked like he’d never played a defensive role before.
In midfield, the England boys have done their best to hold off the competition. Steven Gerrard was a poor captain and made minimal contribution other than an early goal against the USA. Plus, his total inability to stay in position on the left hand side completed isolated England’s best player, Ashley Cole, exposing him to counter attacks and stifling any forward runs. Alongside him in midfield, Gareth Barry was pretty much the worst holding midfielder in the World Cup. Barry was never in position to stop opposition attacks and his passing was woeful. These two are joined by Franck Ribery. Every time I’ve watched the Frenchman over the last two years, I’ve wondered what the fuss is about. Again here, Ribery’s contribution was nonexistent. He couldn’t beat a man, couldn’t pass, couldn’t shoot and generally moped around in a horrible French outfit. Players who came close this three man midfield include Kaka, who despite hype never really had any impact, and Sidney Govou – to be fair to Govou, how he found himself starting for France I do not know as he’s been utterly useless for about five years. Probably has a good star sign though…
Up top, Wayne Rooney was an automatic selection for being the worst player in the entire tournament. Nicolas Anelka was close to being automatic too for his shocking display before being dispatched home. It was sadly back to the bad old days of ‘Le Sulk’ during this World Cup. Fernando Torres was in the running for the final spot, although has been spared because he clearly wasn’t fit at any point. So the last berth goes to Alberto Gilardino, who was really, really poor and looked so far from a top class centre forward it was a little embarrassing.
So here is the confirmed line up of the CollinsBeans Worst XI of the World Cup, set out in a 4-3-3 formation:
GK: Julio Cesar
RB: Nicolas Otamendi
CB: Martin Demichelis
CB: Fabio Cannavaro
LB: William Gallas
CM: Gareth Barry
CM: Steven Gerrard
CM: Franck Ribery
ST: Wayne Rooney
ST: Nicolas Anelka
ST: Alberto Gilardino
Comments are welcome, as always.
It says it all that these players all come from the 'big nations' with vaunted reputations and who so often fail to impress on the international stage. Whereas players from countries like New Zealand and Slovenia seem to raise themselves when they pull on their national shirt, these guys failed to impress spectacularly. I can’t see a reason for how you could defend any of these players, and considering the hype around some of them, that made their ‘flopping’ all the more spectacular.
ReplyDeleteI know a few of them were clearly not match fit, but Gareth Barry’s performance’s for example show how over excited we can get in this country about even the most functional of players. He can pass a ball five yards sideways! He can stand on the halfway line! He can put in the odd tackle! Well not in this tournament, he couldn’t even do those. To be honest , I wasn’t sure who deserved more entries in this team; the French, for their despicable attitudes during it, or the English, who didn’t even have the excuse they weren’t trying.